A Visit Home and Four Stories

Even though it's been awhile since I've posted, don't think that I'm not constantly writing posts in my head.  I am always resolving to do better and then I get overwhelmed and don't know where to start again. Can you say clutter in my head?  Jumping back in seemed like the right thing to do though.

I've just come back from a visit to my family in NC.  It was my first visit since my Mother passed away and probably why I avoided it for so long.  It was wonderful to have such a long visit and be a part of each person's world for a little while.  You really can't spend quality time only visiting on the holidays.  I'm really grateful that I was able to go and believe me I got to do lots of decluttering during my stay.

It's so "me" to want to help declutter and it's really one of my favorite things to do while I'm there.  To the average person, it sounds bizarre but it's my own special way of helping since I'm never around to help with anything else.  In particular, I have two aunts, one who loves to declutter and the other who, ahem, doesn't. I also tried to inspire my Nanny to declutter but she just ended up thinking I wanted her to throw away everything, which isn't true at all.  I also made a stop at a friend's house who needed some help decluttering her son's old room.

The reason I named myself The Closet Therapist is because delving into someone's stuff and seeing their connection to it really allows you to see inside their head.  I really use counseling skills to identify the reasoning behind keeping things that no longer serve you.  To that person, it may or may not be clutter at that point.  Sensitivity is always in order when going through someone's things.  I try but sometimes I just laugh at what a person wants to keep.  Ultimately it's up to them though.

Let me tell you about Aunt #1 who loves to declutter.  All you have to do is say declutter and she is pulling things out and wanting to get them out the door.  This is so easy for me!  We can laugh and joke about how long she has had something and there are no tug of wars.  Ironically, the only thing that I have a problem with is her getting rid of is something that I gave her!  Not a good example, am I?  She is also the one I can trust enough to tell me when to let something go.  She is not so gentle though and loves to exaggerate!  Everyone needs a friend like that in their life.

She also loves to have my old stuff so a visit with her always ends up being several bags of clothes out of my own closet.  She's lost weight and I've gained some so my clothes are looking better on her anyway.  This is all the bags I stuffed into the back of my car to leave with her.  It was fun for me because every item I pulled out, she said "I was just saying I needed that!"  Win-win!

Aunt #2, whom I joked would remain nameless to protect the innocent guilty, is equally as fun to help but a bit more challenging.  Things go slower with her because she loves every item and with each comes a story.  It's great to hear the stories and I think it helps with letting go, but when you have a whole lot of clothes, I had to cut short the walk down memory lane.  I felt harsh, but kept saying "Yes or No and no story."  I love her though and her giggle every time I would say that.  Here is an item that she didn't really want to let go, but managed to say goodbye.  That's $1.00 she'll never get back.

We chose a couple of spaces to focus on because I only had about two days with 4-5 hours each day.  We managed to declutter a lot of things but I felt the most important thing is that at the end of our time that she was left with something clean.  When you have to go through item by item and reminisce along the way, it takes a lot of time so I knew that I was going to leave her with a lot to do on her own.  I also tried to leave her house with all the Goodwill items in tow.  There is nothing worse than looking at that bag for weeks and eventually picking back through it in regret.  I tried to leave with this little one, but she wasn't having it.  Miss Rizzo used to be my dog but when I moved to Texas I left her with my aunt who said "Miss Rizzo helps her get out of bed in the morning."

I stayed most of my visit at my Nanny's house.  She had mentioned to me that she wanted to go through some things in her utility room, in particular her Christmas decorations.  She wasn't ever planning to use them again and hadn't used them in years because she has a little tree that illuminates and doesn't need ornaments.  Since my Grandfather passed away a few years ago, going through anything in her house was a hard task for her.  Everything has memories and there is a feeling of not wanting things to change any more than they already have.

We had some miscommunication where I thought she wanted to clean things out but she only wanted to put them in different containers.  We joked that she had a box to keep and a box to keep to throw away.  Understandably, she wants anyone in the family to look through them before she discards them. Dealing with sentimental items are the hardest clutter to handle because of all the memories tied up in them.  It was a sweet time to spend with her, even though I may have worn her out with my big ideas.

Lastly, my visit to my friend's house was very brief but it just so happened that I was staying in the room that held her son's old things.  These things included an Atari, all his books from childhood and his old crib bedding.  I think he is 35 years old now.

I watched my friend go through all these things that she has lovingly cared for all these years and they were in pristine condition.  Some things were sentimental and some she thought might be useful for her grandson.  I asked her to go through the sentimental baby clothes and stuffed animals and just to keep what really had a good memory.  She agreed that the socks could be passed on and also the toys that weren't his favorite.  It's ok to keep a small amount of items if they make you happy.  The other items the son needs to take so he can sell them or put them in his own house.

The point with her is that she wants to make this room like a sanctuary for herself which will be reflective of things that she loves and needs now.  Having boxes and boxes of old books may be great memories and still in good condition but they are taking up real estate that she needs in order to have her serenity now.  I pointed out that the library still has these books and if her grandson wants to read them, he can.  Also, she or her son can sell them on amazon to earn some money from them.  Here are some photos which she may kill me for posting.  The right one is just some of the books stored so tidily and taking up a lot of space.

Overall my trip wasn't about decluttering but spending precious time with family.  I was gone for two weeks and it was so fun just to be a part of their lives for awhile.  I also was able to visit with more family and a friend who was my maid of honor in our wedding.  The mountains were so refreshing after being in Texas for almost six years.  I hope you'll be inspired by these decluttering stories and you'll go conquer some of your own piles of stuff today.  I'll leave you with a taste of the mountains of North Carolina just for fun.  

Just in case you were wondering where to buy your Nascar pillows.

Oh no she din't!  Oh yes, I brought some back for G and he gives it a thumbs up.  It's a staple in the kitchens of this region and it really is good although I haven't brought myself to eat it because I'm trying to lose the weight from all those biscuits and sweet tea.

Lastly is a picture from my Dad taking me on a 2 hour Harley ride through the mountain area of NC where my family is from and still live now.  It's so beautiful and everyone seems to have their own little mountain stream.  It was a gorgeous day and a highlight of my visit.

And anyone who worried about Gustavo while I was away for so long needn't have worried.  I left him a freezer full of individually sized dinners, arroz con pollo and spaghetti and meatballs.  He also managed to not do laundry the entire time I was gone.  

Turn Your Hangers Around

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Recently I attended a women's retreat that was put on by our church.  They have different seminars that you can attend.  I guess it's no surprise that I attended the one on organizing!  I cannot get enough of the subject of organizing and decluttering and it's always fun to see another perspective.

A lot of the information was about streamlining processes in your life like mail sorting and laundry.  I'm always looking to get a tidbit that will make my life efficient and also pass along to others.  So I am here to pass along a little gem that she shared with us.  You've probably heard of it, but maybe have never tried it.

It's just a simple little trick to determine what clothes you really do wear.  As you can see from the title, just turn your hangers around.  I did this last week and I'm already getting confirmation of what I thought I needed to let go.  I'm using this process to further edit my summer clothes.    I feel like I've got a lot of shirts but still I don't like a lot of the ones I have.  How typical am I, I know!  I'll be contending with these backwards hangers throughout the summer, but definitely at the end of the summer heads shirts will roll!

I'm actually surprised that something so simple can be so effective in eliminating arguments with yourself about what you actually wear.  Maybe you are like me and when you change out your seasonal clothes, you can talk yourself into keeping items a little bit longer.  

Has anyone tried this?  I'll be honest it took me a little while to do this.  I was a tiny bit smug and didn't want to admit to needing this process.  Au contraire though, because The Closet Therapist needs a dose of reality too!  Hopefully by the end of this process, we'll have more empty hangers and less clutter.

New Fave Fashion Blog

*** Blogger deleted this yesterday, so I'm reposting but it came through wonky.  Sorry for the duplication!


Don't you love it when you find a blogger that you relate to so well that you want to invite her for lunch?  Or find a blog written by someone who inspires you to be a better you, inside and out?  I bet this lovely gal doesn't even realize that she is such a great inspiration to us virtual strangers.  She has a what I wear daily type fashion blog but also writes about losing weight, working out, body image and self-esteem.  I love that she is such a great role model to women with her attitude about these subjects.

Well, enough compliments, go see her for yourself!  Her blog is The Daily Sophisticate and you are going to love her.

I love her adorable outfits she posts every day.  Even if I might not wear the same things, I think that she shows how playing around with your style can be so fun. She also copies a lot of looks which is a great thing to do when you are feeling stale in your wardrobe.

Speaking of copycat, I actually showed my hairdresser her hair picture when I had my hair cut recently.  My hair isn't as long as hers so I found a photo when her hair was shorter.  Obviously I'm smitten!  Total blog crush here.

Oh, and if you think that's funny, I also ordered one of the shirts that she had on. I'm not ashamed to admit it!  Isn't it the sincerest form of flattery?  It's this shirt and it's on sale at Nordstrom right now.

Who else has a blog crush they want to share?  I believe that certain people resonate with us 

because they have something that we might need to work on in our own life.  Do you ever feel

drawn to someone and you don't really know why?  Let me know how you like this blog and 

suggest your favorites too!

A Mother's Day Message

Mother's Day is a hard day for me.  It's doubly hard when you are trying to become a mother and have lost your mother.  I want to say Happy Mother's Day to all of you, but also send a little bit of a different message.

I want to remind you that if someone in your life has experienced the pain of miscarriage, don't forget them.  You don't have to celebrate with them the same way, but maybe just a hug and encouraging word.  You can say that you know this day might be painful for them but you are praying that next year they will know the joy of this holiday.  You can say that they are a mother in their heart.  

This day is also painful for those suffering with infertility and you may want to quietly acknowledge them too with a word of hope and encouragement.

For those who have lost their mothers, this day holds a pain that is almost unbearable.  When you lose your mother, you lose the person who loves you the most unconditionally in this world.  There is a tremendous loss in your heart and that is the only way I can describe it.  Please hug those around you who have lost their Mother!  A warm, loving hug can help heal their heart today.

Today we are taking the day off from all Mother's Day activities at church.  I knew this day would be hard so my sweet husband is taking me to Galveston and to a Greek Festival.  I want to acknowledge this day with peace and being loving to myself.  

I hope that all of you that are blessed to have your Mother will spend the day honoring her, and all of you Mothers are being honored for all your hard work.  You deserve all the hugs and love that you get today too!

My Favorite Natural Mascara

I've been experimenting with natural makeup and skin care products for a while now and wanted to report my findings on natural mascara.  Apparently mascara is one of the harder items to replace from traditional ingredients.  There are issues like smudging and not being a good replacement for old favorites in the way it performs.

I had been a repeat buyer of Loreal Voluminous mascara when I decided to stop buying pricey department store brands.  I think the result is great from Loreal, but I decided to see if I could find a more natural alternative.  Ironically, now I'm back to buying pricey mascaras!

Who knows how much a mascara really affects our health, I mean I don't like to be extreme.  However I do believe an accumulation of toxic products can't be good for us, especially when we use a lot of products with chemicals every day that soak into our skin.

I could have written about this mascara a long time ago, but in the interest of research I tried a few more and now know that I have absolutely found my favorite.  First I'll tell you about the others that didn't cut it for me.  Physician's Formula can be bought at the drugstore which is great and has the right price but there were no other redeeming qualities.  The packaging is really bulky, the mascara smudged terribly, and it wasn't volumizing at all.  Overall, a big fat no, and I even took it back to the store to return it.  I couldn't even bear to finish the tube.

The next one I decided to try, Zuzu Luxe, was handy to buy because I could pick it up at Whole Foods.  I'm using it right now and it's an ok mascara if you like a more natural look.  I would compare it with Clinique Glossy Mascara.  I have to layer it though to get the volume that I want and even though it does layer well, I can't be bothered with all that work.

It seems to come off ok with my cleanser which is one of my big requirements for mascara.  I don't like seeing eyelashes coming out every night on my washcloth.  In short, Zuzu Luxe doesn't smudge and I would recommend it for the person who wants natural looking lashes.

Finally, drum roll please, my favorite mascara is by 100% pure pictured above, which I have tried it in black tea and blackberry, a plummy color.  The first thing you will love about this one is that it smells fruity when you put it on because it's pigmented with fruit! The second is the beautiful silver container. It's the little pleasures in life that make me happy!  I really didn't want to like this mascara the best because of the price, but I'm a believer and will be ordering more.  I'm excited to try more of their products, but only when I finish up my latest project of course.  (I've already finished 9 products!)

If you are looking to try a natural mascara and want to try this one, I have good news for you!  This weekend they are having a promotion for free shipping so it's a perfect time to try out this or some of the other fab products.  I have also tried their concealer and bubble bath and I am a fan.  If you are curious about what makes this mascara so special, you can see how awesome this ingredient list is below.

FRUIT PIGMENTED
MASCARA

100% Natural, 100% Vegetarian

100% natural mascara lengthens, separates, thickens and glosses lashes with fruit pigments and Black tea pigments. Lash conditioning ProVitamin B5, Vitamin E, Oat and Wheat protein conditions for healthier lashes. Gentle, all natural, good for you formula is suitable for everyone, even if you wear contacts or have sensitive eyes. Water and smudge resistant.

Colors:
Black Tea - blackest black - 0.32 oz / 7 g
Blackberry - shimmery black plum - 0.32 oz / 7 g
Blueberry - shimmery blue black - 0.32 oz / 7 g
Dark Chocolate - shimmery black brown - 0.32 oz / 7 g

Ingredients: Organic Green Tea, Vitamin E (a-tocopherol), Honey Beeswax, Contains All or some of the following Pigments: Blackberry, Blueberry, Black Tea, Grape Skin, Pomegranate, Acai Berry, Boysenberry, Blackcurrant and Raspberry, Oat Protein, Wheat Protein, Provitamin B5, Seaweed Powder, Coconut Stearic acid, Mica (for shimmer in the Blackberry and Blueberry), Cocoa Butter, Pearl Powder, Rice Powder, Cacao Powder and Powdered Coffee Beans, Lavender Honey, Extracts of Oregano, Thyme, Rosemary, Lavender and Golden Seal

So lovely ladies, I'm curious if you are concerned about all the junk we are putting in our bodies and on our faces too.  I've been a part-time granola in this area, but whenever I have the opportunity to buy something new I always try to make a better choice.  I don't want to spend lots of money to do it though, and will shop the aisles of Whole Foods first looking for a solution.  Have you seen the video below about cosmetics?  I'd love to hear your opinions!

Project 10 Pan

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I am reluctant to write about this, but I figured if I got this little bit of crazy maybe someone else does too.  Maybe you've heard of the phenomena called "Project 10 Pan", maybe not.  In the makeup blogger community there was a blogger named Laura who decided that she wanted to use up 10 items of makeup before she bought more.  This idea caught on and there are thousands of girls struggling through their beloved products so that they can eventually buy more.  Just for fun google Project 10 Pan, or P10P and see what you find.  There are even You Tube videos showing others the items that they are using up!  Who knew that anyone would be interested?

As someone who loves to clean out clutter, I find this topic fascinating.  When I really stopped to think about it as I explained it to G, I saw the irony and ridiculousness of this makeup hoarding collecting and at the same time the virtue of wanting to use it up.  I think in their hearts, they know that they can't possibly ever use that much makeup but they have been seduced into buying into every gimmick that comes around.  I know it's fun because I love makeup too, but where are the limits?  In my own makeup drawer, I'm ready to define limits on the quantity that I should have.  For me, it's just that--ridiculous to have too much and I do want the satisfaction of using up what I paid a lot of money to purchase.

Now, I'm not a makeup hoarder but you could say that I have enough to last me a long, long time because there is so much variety.  I have already been on a "no-buy" for awhile now, but now I wanted to focus my efforts to use up things in order to yes, have less variety.  Who knew as I accumulated all this selection of colors that my desire eventually would be to only have a few.  I do give away items as my friends and family know, because I'll usually include a lipgloss or something fun in with whatever I am sending.  So I have my initial 10 items selected and I will be going along to reduce the amount of makeup clutter/variety in my life.  The only difference is that I won't be purchasing more, but will persist in focusing on the half used up items in my collection.

Anyone want to make fun of me for making my little list, and setting such a shallow little goal?  Anyone want to join me?  Let's dig out all that beauty stuff and make our vanities clutter free.

P.S.  If you are not familiar with the makeup lingo, "pan" is the term given for the bottom of the makeup tray.  A moment of glory is when you "hit pan", and if you want to see a lot of pan, look up "pan porn"!!

His Closet, Her Dressing Room

Pretty Closet Alert!! 

I LOVE seeing closets that are not only functional but full of sweet details. Sara at Russet Street Reno is a closet decorating genius! I know you are going to think that her dressing room and her newly decorated husband's closet are just as swoonworthy as I did.

Check out this capiz chandelier, calming neutral paint & gorgeous curtains, not to mention a settee to sit down and put on your shoes.  Oooh and the mirrored tray full of perfume is pure luxury here people!   And look at that huge full length mirror. Sigh.

The first three photos are her dressing room and the last three are her husband's closet.  The greek tile rugs are so bright and cheery!

Isn't the dress all set to go for wearing the next day a cool idea?  It doesn't hurt that it is color coordinated with the decor.

That is a lot of clothes, and only shirts!

Beautiful in closet storage drawers

There's a stylish light in here too.  I love the paint color.  Look at the uniform hangers and color coordination!  It looks like she might do some closet space sharing with hubby.  Who says having a whole room for your closet is enough?

OK, closet lovers, what do you think of this beauty?  Does it make you look at your closet a little differently? Who is completely inspired and mesmerized, like I am? Let's have some respect for our house of clothes and doll it up like the rest of our homes!